Paradise Lost, Paradise Found
by The Dark Novak
Summary: -High School AU- The Winchesters have had a tough life since their parents died, so Bobby tries to make it better by taking them to Michigan. They always used to go to the lakes when they were younger. After they start school Sam and Dean meet new people that will diffidently help them get out of the abyss they ended up in, and overcome the events of their dark past.
1. Chapter 1

Hello guys I've been meaning to write a Destiel fanfiction for the longest time. Well here is the first chapter, if anything is confusing its probably something that will be explained in a later chapter. Please tell me what you think guys.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters involved in supernatural.

Prologue: After the death of their father the Winchester boys felt alone, it was just them and no one could save them from sinking further and further down. Tragedies that plagued their life never seemed to end. Bobby knew he had to help his boys in some way, they seemed to be losing hope in this world. He needed to find somewhere that they could be happy so he left his town in Illinois and brought them to a the town of Lansing, Michigan. That was the best city Bobby could find to get work, and be able to take the boys up north to his cabin by the lake. Their school doesn't look all that great, but they would have to make the best of it.

Chapter 1: The New Kids

Dean walked down the stairs of Bobby's house, heading towards the table where Sam was sitting eating cereal. He then proceeded to pour himself a bowl and sat across the table from his brother. "Where's Bobby" Dean said in curious voice. "He left for work about 15 minutes ago" Sam said while taking in another spoonful of cereal. Bobby had gotten a job at the local Garage/Salvage yard. The boys were grateful for their adopted Dad to be doing all of this for them. Sam finished his breakfast and headed to his room to get his backpack. It was the boys first day at their new school, Sexton High School. "Come on Dean, we're gunna be late if you don't hurry up." Sam yelled from the front door.

Dean proceeded to put his dishes in the sink and run upstairs to get his bag as well. They both walked outside to Dean's car, a black 67' Impala. He had gotten the car from his father before he passed away. Sam and Dean got into the vehicle and the older Winchester started the engine, and it roared to life. When they arrived at the school they parked in the student parking section. The school seemed big on the outside, but when they got inside it was a lot smaller than they expected. They went inside the office to ask where the counseling center was and were directed several doors down the hall. Since they had gotten to the school early, not many students were there yet, or they were in the cafeteria eating breakfast. The boys entered the counselors office, and were greeted by Ms. Hubbard, the head counselor.

They went into her office, it didn't take that long to sort out their schedules. Dean was a Senior, and Sam was a Freshman. When they exited the room, a lot more students were flooding the hallways. The boys knew this was an inner city school, but they did expect it to be so ghetto. The lights were flickering, and there were loud kids that you'd only expect to see in the Ron Clark story except these kids weren't going to improve. Well some of them looked like they might be smart, but not many of them. Sam and Dean parted to head towards their classes. Dean had AP Biology first hour, he stopped at the locker he was assigned and put his bag inside.

He got to the classroom on time after being directed by this kid named Michael Milton. When he entered the classroom he was given a text book by the teacher, Mr. Farrel. "Good Morning class, we have a new student today" Mr. Farrel gestured at Dean for him to introduce himself. "Uhhh Hi my names Dean Winchester." Dean said, slightly embarrassed because he hated introductions. Mr. Farrel directed him to the open seat at the front of the classroom. He got to sit next to his new friend Michael, and on the other side of him was some kid he hadn't met yet. He didn't want to bother the kid because he was talking to another kid that was on the other side of him. The teachers was lecturing, when the phone rang. He headed towards it and picked it up. Dean whispered over to Michael asking who those two guys were

"They're these gay kids named..." Michael said before getting cut off. "First of all, you don't need address us as 'those gay kids', and second of all if he wanted to know who we were he could have asked us himself. My name is Scott, and this is Castiel." Scott said while pointing to the boy he was sitting next to. Dean wasn't sure what to say, because he had offended them. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend, I just simply wanted to know who you were and you seemed busy so I didn't bother you. I just wanted to make some new friends since it was his first day." Dean said. The green eyed boy didn't even know why he wanted to talk to them, he wasnt gay. He just thought maybe he wanted to make more friends and make the best out of living here, but there was this weird feeling that kept telling him to be friends with Castiel.

He didn't know why, but he was drawn to the teen's blue eyes and innocent looking nature. "Well you could have just waited to ask us, its more formal that way. Besides you seem like just another bigot, unless you are a closet case. We get enough from bullies in this school, just because we're gay we get harassed, and just because we are together all the time people think we're a couple. We arent, we are just best friends, not that you care. If you really want to be our friends then you'll have to prove yourself. I'm not trying to act like we're special or anything, because we aren't. We are just like any other normal people." Castiel said.

"Yeah I can do my best to prove myself, but I'm not a ffffa...gay. I have no problem with gay people, my brother is openly gay as well. " Dean said while cursing himself in his head. He almost let a bigot term come out of his mouth. He tries so hard to not say those terms since Sam came out to him, but his father had drilled them into his head. He wasn't even their friends yet and he already was fucking stuff up. "Hmmm okay then, just watch it. I dont know what background you came from, but I'd rather not hear bigot terms. I really would like to have some new friends around here, but not ones who talk about me behind my back." Castiel said with force. The teacher got off the phone and continued his lecture. Dean felt someone poke him, and he turned around to see that it was some blonde girl. "Hey my name is Jo Harvelle" she said while extending her hand for Dean to shake. "Don't think they're mean, because those two boys are some of the nicest people that I have ever met, they just take so much crap from the bigots at this school that you can never be too careful. Unless you are a bigot, than you deserve the rudeness and more." Jo said in a soft voice that only Dean could hear.

Before Dean knew it was lunch time. Sam and Dean requested that they have the same lunch hour, so Sam could be watched over by Dean. He was really protective of his little brother, and would do anything to make him happy. Thats why he was going to find a part time job to help bring in money for Sam's college fund. With Sam's high grades there was no doubt that he could get into the college of his dreams. Dean had to make it happen, he wanted Sam to be happy; even if that meant that he would have to suffer. Sam deserved it after the incident that happened a couple years before.

Sam was still scarred from it. Dean was still scarred from it, and he blamed himself for not being able to do anything about it. The brothers sat at a table with Michael, and his younger brother Gabriel that was in the same grade as Sammy. They spent most of their time telling each other about their day. Sam told Dean that it was good, and there were only a couple people that let out offensive slurs to him. Dean thought that was probably just because he was new and not a lot of people knew him. The lunch room seemed loud, hot, and crowded. Dean hated being in places like this, but he took his mind off of it.

Dean noticed that Castiel was sitting with his friends at the table across the room. He wanted to go over and say hi, but he was still listening to his brother talk about how he liked all of his classes. He made a mental note that it would be kind of stalker like to just randomly approach Castiel, so he just stayed at his table listening to his brother talk. Surprisingly he began to talk to Gabriel. He didn't know much about the kid, but he seemed to have a sweet tooth judging from the amount of candy he removed from his lunch bag. Sam seemed happy that he made a new friend, and Dean was happy as well. He wanted his brother to feel that way. The rest of the day was uneventful, and Dean seen Castiel a couple more times, and talked to him; actually getting to know him a little more.

He wondered when it his mind had focused solely on Castiel, but he put it off as nothing and got in his car with Sam. Then he started the engine and began his drive home. This might place might help me, Dean thought. I'm really tired of being sad and lonely all the time, he thought again. Dean knew he had something wrong with his emotions, but he just hid everything. He needed to make Sam the first priority. When the boys got home, Sam went to do his homework and Dean went to his bed to crash. He fell asleep almost instantly for it had been a long day for him.


	2. Chapter 2

Well peoples, heres chapter two. Sorry I took so long for a second chapter. I really hope you guys will take the time to read this.

Chapter 2: Feelings Rising

Dean woke up with the sun shining down on him through the curtains. He knew today might be better, but anything could happen. "Hey Sammy" Dean said as he went downstairs. His brother simply shrugged head as to signal a hello. The green eyed boy ate his breakfast at a faster pace than usual. He wanted to get to school early so he could see Cas and make friends with him.

~meanwhile~

Cas was heading out to catch the bus. He was wondering how Dean was going to try and make nice with him. It's not that Cas didn't want to be friends with Dean, he just didn't know if he could trust him. See Cas has known Scott since they were kids. They have been with each other through being bullied. Cas even offered his house to Scott after his parents had kicked him out for finding out he was gay. He only stayed a couple of days before moving in with his uncle. Being together all that time you'd think that they would be attracted to each other, but they never felt that way about each other. They were more like brothers. "Hey d'you finish the Math homework? I'm missing the last answer." Scott said as he approached Cas at the bus stop.

Cas simply just handed him the paper. "So do you really think that Dean kid is being serious about being friends, or is he just another asshole." Scott said as they were in the bus heading to school. "Yeah I want to trust him, he seems nice. Cas said while fiddling with his phone. "Awww look who has a crush on the new kid." Scott said while playfully nudging his friend. Cas' face turns a light pink color in response to the statement. "I don't like him! Even if I did, it wouldn't matter. He's one of those straight looking jock boys." the blue eyed boy said.

"Haha, you don't know that. Maybe you can convert him to our 'unholy religion' as the churches say." Scott said while making air quotations. Cas laughed while he made his way off the bus. He knew that there was an almost 99.9% chance that Dean was straight, but what if that 1 percent made all the difference? He usually didn't like many people in a more than friendly way, but Dean's manly charisma drew him in. He was scared though, many times he had to help Scott when his heart was broken from unrequited love. They helped each other through their depression problems as well. Cas had gotten over most of his problems and stopped self harming. He made Scott stop too, after he had done the unthinkable. Cas knew how Scott felt, but he didn't want him to ever try suicide again. He needed his best friend, and wanted him to have a happy long life. He knew that Scott wanted the same and regrets what he did. They were alone and only had their brother to help them through the bullying, the depression, and the hate from people.

By high school it had gotten slightly better, but there were still people talking. Cas and Scott had made more friends and opened up more. They both still had their problems, but if they took it day by day, the brothers would indeed make it through. "Hey Cas." Dean said, snapping Castiel out of his trance. "Hello Dean." Cas said as he began to walk into the building with his soon to be friend. The green eyed boy accompanies Cas to Scott's locker. He figured since they all had the same first house, they could walk together. As they were heading to class, a random student made a hateful remark. "Hey fags, trying to steal the new student" The student said, walking by. Dean responds by giving him the finger and saying "Hey asshole, why don't you get you bigot ass to class before I kick it." When they arrived in class Dean took his spot next to Michael and Castiel.

"Hey man what's up." Michael said to Dean. The boy responded with a simple "Sup" then got out his half done AP Biology work. "Pssst Cas, did you finish your work? I'm missing like half of the paper." Dean said as he was trying to lean over and peak at Cas' homework. The teacher hadn't yet arrived in the classroom, and he wanted to take advantage of this time to get the answers to his homework. "You haven't been at this school for more than one day and you're already copying work?" Cas says, handing him the paper. Dean quickly writes down the answers and finishes it. "Hey I'm sorry I had to copy, its just that I don't really get biology." Dean said, looking directly into Cas' eyes. Dean didn't know what it was, but he knew there were something about those eyes that he was drawn to. Cas looked as if he was looking into Dean and trying to figure him out. I want to let him in and tell him about my problems, but thats not really something you do when you've just met someone. I should get to know him a little better first and we'll see where we go from there, Dean thought to himself.

"So Cas, are you and Scott like a thing? I'm not gay or anything I just want to know." Dean said as he questioned himself for asking such a question. "No, we are best friends. We have been with each other through the worst of times, but never developed those feelings for each other. All I know is that Cas is like a little brother to me, and I want nothing but the best for him. If anyone were to hurt him, I think I'd have to step in. Whomever he chooses to be with, they better not make me have to get angry, because I may look weak physically but I am a psycho and would beat them into next year." Scott said, directing his statement towards Dean. "Hey, you're not a psycho and you're only a couple months older than me!" Cas said, glaring at Scott. "Well that's good, sorta like me with Sammy." The green eyed boy said as the teacher walked in.

It wasn't long before lunchtime came around. Everyone was sitting at the lunch table, when Dean noticed Sam smiling. Sam's smile hasn't been that bright since before the incident, he thought to himself. He looks to see his younger brother speaking with Gabriel. He knew Sammy was gay ever since middle school when he came out to Dean. At first he was confused and didnt understand why Sam had those feelings, but he came to understand and even support it. He wanted the best for his brother and would never shun him for any means necessary. Even know that he knows Sam is messed up mentally from what happened in Hell, he will still stick with him and try to help him get better. Dean zoned out remembering what had happened in Hell, MI, but before he could remember the bad parts Cas snapped him out of it. "Hey you want to go out to the movies on Saturday with me, Scott, and Jo?" Cas said with a smile.

I must be gaining his trust, he wants me to hang out with him, Dean thought to himself. "Sure why not? Can Sammy come too, I don't want to leave him at home with nothing to do. Its our first week here so I don't think he knows many people." Dean retorted with a questionable look on his freckled face. "Dean I have plans on Saturday." Sam said from across the table. "With who your laptop?" The older winchester said while letting out a chuckle. "No, I am going to hang out with Gabe." Sam says while gesturing at Gabriel who is sitting beside him.

The rest of the school day goes by uneventful, except that Dean had come to know a little more about Cas and even some stuff about Scott. That was expected though, because they are so close that you would have to know some stuff about both, not just one or the other. He got to know that Cas liked almost all types of music, especially classic rock, he liked to draw, he along with Scott were A students, they both were in the drama department, and were in Japanese club. They were almost fluent in the language, and Scott already could speak Spanish because he was half hispanic. Cas could speak a little bit of Spanish, because Scott had taught him, but was much better at Japanese. When it came to the drama department Cas and Scott usually did the behind the scenes work, called teching. Cas had played in several plays, and Dean thought that it was cool. The final thing he noticed in their AP World Geography class. Scott had taken off his coat and he noticed faint lines upon his wrists. Dean knew exactly what they were, and he knew the feeling all too well. He wondered why he would do that, but then he knew that there was probably reasons and he just didn't know yet. What gave him even more of a shock was Cas, he too had faint white lines on his wrists. Have they both gone through depression and issues? Dean thought to himself. They seem so happy, I sure hope they don't do that anymore. I mean I know how hard it is to quit cutting, because when you feel like that and start with the self harm, you just get used to it. You get used to the blood and pain. You get used to hiding your wrists from people. Dean rambles on in his head.

Sam and Dean arrive home when school ends. "So Sammy how have you been feeling? Are you starting to feel better? Do you think this city can help both of us?" Dean said while looking at his brother. "I think so, and to be honest with you Dean. I know it has only been a couple of days, but I think I like Gabe. He is sort of a trickster, but he is just so nice to me. We found out a lot about each other. He is gay as well, and he's sort of a sugar junkie. I really think things could get better here Dean. What about you? Got a big gay crush on Cas'?" Sam chuckled out as he went to sit on the plops down next to Sam and says "I think we can make the best of things here Sammy, and I'll make sure you get into Stanford. And what? I don't have a big gay crush on Cas, he is just a friend. I am not gay, you bitch. Sam smiles "Jerk."


	3. Chapter 3

Warning: self harm

Chapter 3: Bad Memories Surface

Dean woke on saturday morning, and was more anxious than usual. He was going to the movies later with his new friends. "Sammy hurry up in there, I need to take a shower." Dean said, impatiently tapping his foot. "What need to get ready for your date later with your big gay crush?" Sam said in a sarcastic tone. "Shut up, Bitch I told you already, He is a friend. Besides we are going in a group." Dean snarled. About 5 minutes later Sam came out of the bathroom, steam accompanying him. "There jerk, go get all dolled up for later." the younger Winchester said walking to his bed to get his clothes.

After an hour long shower, Dean emerged to see Sam at the door. "Whose at the door Sammy?" The older Winchester said, walking to see who could possibly be there so early. "Hey Dean-O, I shall be stealing Samsquatch for the day." Gabe said, stepping into their home. Dean hushed Gabe, explaining that Bobby was still sleeping. When their small chit chat was over Sam proceeded out the door. "You be careful Sammy." Dean breathed, watching his brother close the door behind him. He was very protective over Sam, he blamed himself fo the terrible things that his brother went through.

Everything seemed to wash over him at once. He remembered Lucifer, and the terrible things that he did to Sam. Everyone saw Dean as this strong protective person, but he wasn't everyone he tried protecting got hurt. He thought about how he'd failed his parents, and how they'd left him with Sammy to care for, sure Bobby was there but they needed a motherly figure as well and Bobby was far from it. Dean got up and grabbed his pocket knife. He held it to his wrist. He cut once, then again, then again. He did it several more times before dropping the knife. The blood streamed down his arm. Tears fell from his face. "Shit" he breathed, letting out soft sobs. He went to the kitchen are cleaned himself up. Dean then threw on his leather jacket, knowing he needed to cover the fresh marks on his wrist.

Dean pushed his feelings aside, and grabbed the keys to his Impala, and drove to the address that Castiel had given him. "You're a little early aren't you?" Cas said, wiping the sleep out of his eyes. Dean shifted uncomfortably and starred as he pawed at his eyes. "Yeah sorry about that. I was wondering if you wanted to hang out with me. Sorry, I should have called, I can just come back later." Dean said, turning to take his leave. "Wait, I'll spend the day with you. Just let me throw some clothes on. I'm guessing Gabe is off somewhere with Sam? I don't know about you but I think they make a cute couple." Cas said. Dean nodded and watched as Cas ran up to his room to get changed.

After about 5 minutes of standing Cas emerged from the house in a plaid shirt, and khaki pants. "So where are we going?" The blue eyed boy said, pulling out his phone. "Uhhhh I don't know yet." Dean spoke in a nervous voice. He hadn't expected Cas to even say yes to the offer. Castiel dialed Scott's number and informed him that he'd see him later at the movies and to not come over because he'd be with Dean. After he hung up Cas suggested that they go to Hawk Island, which was a small lake with a beach and a nice trail to walk on. Cas stepped inside real quick to get his backpack and filled it with stuff he might need. Dean nodded and they both headed towards the Impala.

Since Dean didn't know the city all too well yet, Cas had to be the one to tell him how to get to there. Once they arrived Cas suggested thay they take a walk. "Come on this way" the scrawny teen said, walking towards the beginning of the trail. Dean couldn't help but smile at the boy's enthusiasm with nature. Although Dean couldn't put his finger on it, there was something about Cas that made him at ease.

After a couple hours of walking on the trail they returned to the main area next to the beach. "Want to go swimming?" I know the water doesn't look all too good, but its just a little lake water." Cas said, walking to the car to get his bag. "I don't know, I didn't bring anything to swim in." Dean breathed, knowing the real reason he didn't want to because there was a chance that Cas would see his scars. The blue eyed boy gave a clever smirk and pulled out two pairs of swimming trunks he turned to Dean and said "I thought you might say that, which is why I brought an extra pair."

Dean knew he couldn't deny it now. He would just have to do his best to hide the fresh marks that were on his wrists. They both entered the changing room and changed into their swimwear. Cas was the first to finish and stood there waiting for Dean to exit. When Dean came out of the room Cas couldn't help but stare at Dean's body. 'All of that work in the garage did his body good' Cas thought getting lost in Dean's chest and abs. "Take a picture it will last longer" The eldest Winchester said with a grin.

Cas rolled his eyes and they both headed towards the beach. Dean figured the best way to hide his scars was to keep his arms crossed or to his sides at all times. The azure eyed boy laid out a towels for them to lay on when they were finished swimming. "Ready?" He said oncs more. "Yeah its hot" Dean said walking towards the water with Cas. "Don't get used to it, the weather here is unpredictable and most of the time its cold."

The rest of their day consisted of swimming, laughing, and joking. Dean and Cas playfully splashing each other, Dean getting brave enough to pick Cas up and dunk him in the water. When they were tired they sat in the shallow part of the lake. Cas was about to get up, but slipped backwards. Dean instinctively caught him. Then held out a hand to properly help him up. Cas looked down at Deans wrists and saw bright red lines upon them.

"Dean." Cas said in a sympathetic voice. Dean looked almost terrified that Cas had saw what he tried so hard to hide. "Uhhhh I... I just, I lost it this morning." Dean said looking at the water below him. Cas brought Dean into a hug. "Its okay, I know how it feels." Cas gestured at the faded scars on his wrist. "If you want to talk about it, we can. I am here to help." He said once more. They both went and changed back into their civilian cloths.

"Want to go get some dinner? We can talk about things if you want." Cas said, both of them sitting in the car. After 10 minutes of driving they were in a chinese restaurant. They had gotten their food already and Cas was trying to get Dean to talk about his problems. "Tell me Dean, I'll understand. I can help." The blue eyed boy said eyes sparkling in Dean's direction.

"Well uhhhh it started the last time we were in Michigan. Hell to be exact. Sam had met this guy and they thought he was boyfriend material, but he ended up being a psycho and raping and torturing Sammy. By the time I got there it was too late. Dad blamed me for it, and didn't really care because he resented Sam for being gay. I failed him, I couldn't protect Sammy. Rule number one after mom died was to protect Sammy. Shortly after that Dad's heart gave out and we were left with Bobby. Dad wasnt much of a father, but I didn't wish death on him. Now Sam is mentally scarred. He still has night terrors." Dean said, hot tears streaming down his face.

"Shhh Dean its okay. Its not your fault, it was unavoidable." Cas said, moving next to Dean to comfort him. "Sam will be fine with time, and if anyone can help him forget those awful things its his brother and Gabriel will help as well. He may be a trickster, but he is so gentle and nice. Now come on lets go to the movies, it will get your mind off things." Cas said leaving money on the table.

They arrived at the theater and seen their friends waiting in the lobby. "Hey you guys" Scott said. "You guys better hurry the movies gunna start soon" Jo said gesturing at the line for tickets. They both bought their tickets to the movie "Now You See Me", they got their snacks and soda and headed towards the theater 4. Dean saw Sam and Gabe coming out of some romance movie. "Sammy your seeing chick flicks now? What did I say about that?" Dean said, Sam and Gabe turning around to see Dean.

"There was plenty of violence thank you very much Dean-o." Gabriel said. They both laughed and Sam and Gabe left. When Cas and Dean caught up with the group they had already found places to sit and saved them some seats. The move was great, and just being was Cas made Dean think life was worth living. He was confused though. He shouldn't feel this strongly for Cas. He was straight, only ever been with women. He pushed his feelings aside and dropped Cas off. "Thanks for a wonderful day." Dean said. "You're welcome Dean. I hope we can do this again." The Novak said heading towards his door.


End file.
